Ask Erik is a spiritual advice column from the eternally twenty-year-old spirit guide Erik Medhus. Through gifted medium/spirit translator Kim Babcock, he directly answers readers’ questions on death, the afterlife, spirituality, the human experience, and more with the insight and wisdom he’s gained since his passing.

Dear Erik,

Is there a spiritual basis for in-law conflicts? I bet Erik can point us to where we can buffer those conflicts.

— Joan

Joan: Well, when conflicts occur, no matter who they are between, the underlying lesson that motivates them is the real focal point. You see, before you incarnate, you design your contract to determine what lesson you’ll achieve or work toward in that incarnation. Let’s say you’re working on learning compassion. You learn the value of it and what it means to you because of the lack of it from your sister-in-law. The lesson is the important part, not necessarily the avenue in which you experience that lesson, since that’s where free will can make things interesting.