The New Responsibility
There has been a pain held deep within your beings. And like a butterfly that is held in a glass jar, there is a sense of feeling trapped or feeling contained, confined. And in that is a sense of lack, be it the lack of fresh air for the butterfly or the lack of food. There is a deep sense of lack that is also held in your beings that has to do with a sense of confinement.
Our Paradoxical Relationship to Freedom
There is a fear of freedom, yet there is a desire for flight. So there is the desire to feel limitless in what you can do and what you can attain, but there is also fear woven into that. The desire for flight has to do with flying away—the running and the lack of responsibility. Lack of responsibility is a key ingredient in the experience we have been in until that moment of release that happened months ago when the freedom came and the new phase opened.
The way we have played out the lack of responsibility has been to compensate, becoming too responsible, too watchful, and too controlled. And then the physical structure feels too tight and the breath feels too tight and everything around us is too tight. So how we navigate every aspect of our lives holds this quality, this constriction, this moving inward. It doesn't do this in a way that's beautiful but rather in a way that feels restrictive and constrictive. And this lack of responsibility has led to wanton behaviors: alcohol abuse, drugs, sexual abuse, and a careless, cavalier way of not caring.