How to Raise an Exceptional Child
Developing Omnisensory Perception and Life at School for a Sensitive Child
Our children come, trailing clouds of glory from afar.
The vast majority of life around us is not visible to most people. Cats can see the hidden realms as can some dogs. The extraordinary children being born can too—that is, until most parents program this ability out of them. This is done in the following ways:
- By negating, disbelieving, or denying children's experiences, either because we don't believe there are realities beyond what we can see or because we think it is part of their fantasy world.
- By signaling or feeling fear of the unknown and not trusting the benevolence of the hidden realms. Fear is often present if the child's abilities are seen as mental instability or if they set them apart from others in a way that will ostracize them from their peers. Do we really want the extraordinary to be suppressed simply in order to be acceptable to the mediocrity of the masses?
Teach your children early that they have special gifts others do not—not even yourself, that they have special eyes and ears. Tell them to share their experiences with you; you would love to know what you are missing. Then listen, even if it sounds farfetched. Look at the interdimensional photos on www.interdimensionalphotos. com to see just how amazing the hidden realms really are. Your children may lack the vocabulary necessary to explain their experiences. If so, have them draw it.
Explain how many people in history, like Galileo, have been misunderstood by their peers. Tell your children to share their gifts only at home where they are welcomed and enjoyed.
Your children may have night terrors from seeing things in the bedroom. It is easier to see interdimensionally in the dark or semidark. Instead of telling your children that what they see is not real, hold them in a comforting embrace and have them describe the being to you. Then ask the being what it wants and ask your children to tell you (assuming the children are clairaudient as well as clairvoyant). If they do not hear anything, ask them to sit very still and feel what the being wants.
Do not try to provide answers for the children in areas about which you know nothing. It is the officious arrogance of man to think that his established religions, belief systems, and pat answers can explain anything about the ever-new, unfolding wonders of the universe. It is the beginning of greatness to acknowledge that we know nothing. It is a valuable gift to children when parents can demonstrate through example that there is nothing to know and everything to explore.
Parental protectiveness often blinds us to the fact that our children are masterfully manifesting their own life circumstances. By all means, safeguard your children from potentially hazardous events. It is unlikely that the hidden realms will present these, but if your children have strong feelings that a being is hostile, you may chase it way with strong commands. Remember that some beings, like tree spirits, look very outlandish but are actually benign.
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio. Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
—William Shakespeare, Hamlet, Act I
Omnisensory perception: Special capacity children have been called Indigo children, Crystal children, and many other names. Whatever they are called, it is clear that their senses have greater capacities than the norm. They may "hear" telepathically the tones or songs emitted by flowers, stars, and so on.
Their sensory input may be overwhelming as it is, but add to that the blaring television or noise at school, and they may become dissociative in order to cope. They then run the risk of being branded with attention deficit disorder. They need lots of quiet time, alone time, and time for integration (coming home from school or an activity). Talk to them about what they hear and see so that their special gifts do not isolate them.
Encourage your children to do experimental exercises such as trying to taste the sound of music or hearing the sound of colors. Have them try to hear with the whole body or to see through their skin.
Note that here have been a number of studies testing and documenting the ability of individuals to cross-perceive sensory input. The most extensive are probably the experiments conducted by Russian scientists during the cold war as part of their programs in enhanced espionage techniques. Helen Keller was also reputed to be able to sense some sound and color vibrations through her skin.
Dealing with the gift of empathy: One of my children was so empathic that he could not stand to walk past the children's shoes at school; the pain of their lives spoke too clearly to him, and he felt it as his own. A problem often experienced by empaths is their inability to distinguish whether the feelings involved are their own or those of others.
It is not always easy to spot the empathic qualities of a child. He or she may just seem to be moody. Carefully observe whether the moods of others in your child's environment are affecting him or her. If so, ask him to see how it makes him feel when someone in his environment is sad, angry, or happy.
Once you have jointly established that your child is taking on the feelings of others, explain how this can cause him or her to be like a puppet on a string. If someone pulls your child's "sad string," he or she will respond to that emotion. Make it clear how important it is to live free from others' strings, so they don't determine how he or she should feel.
How to cope with empathic feelings:
- Tell your child to see if what he is feeling belongs to him or to someone else.
- Have him or her ask, "If the other person didn't feel this way, would I?"
- Once he knows he is feeling someone else's pain, and so on, tell him to see it coming from that person, perhaps like a colored breeze. Anger could be red; sadness could be blue. Tell him to let the breeze go right through him and to make sure it does not stick.
- He or she could use a breathing technique—breathing in the other's emotion and then blowing it out. If there is physical distress in the body, pretend there is a mouth in that area and blow the tightness or discomfort out.
Life at School for a Sensitive Child
The more you provide heaven on Earth at home, the more stark the contrast when the child goes to school. Yet the solace of a loving, cherishing environment to come home to is a source of great strength in the face of the often brutal atmosphere of school.
Cultivating individuality in the face of peer pressure: You nurture the individuality and exceptional qualities in your child by providing him or her with an exceptional life. Confidence to boldly and authentically express comes from exceptional experiences. It is quite fine to be different if different means a richer, fuller, more exciting life, a life that peers would love to be a part of.
Creating such a life for you and your child requires extra effort and planning and, if you wish, budgeting of money and time.
Low budget activities: Take a trip to the local pound or pet store to pet the puppies and kittens. I have an arrangement with the local pet store for Jaylene to be their "official puppy petter." I take my work and sit in the car while she gives love and affection to the little animals. Her friends love to join us.
Camping trips with a purpose:
- White water rafting
- Fossil gathering
- Looking for hidden treasure (that you hid for them)
- Bird watching
- Learning about rocks
- Finding remnants of history
Slumber parties that have outrageous activities (under supervision) such as:
- A movie marathon that lasts all night
- A midnight swim and picnic breakfast
- A candlelight dinner at midnight
Take family car trips to no destination to see where you end up. Or plan trips to hot springs or observatories. Take lots of provisions.
We go to thrift stores, dollar stores, and junk shops where children can do their own shopping with their own money. They buy outrageous, glittery, high-heeled shoes and other things that make them feel special and abundant.
We find any excuse to have a party:
- Making ice cream
- Making apple cider
- Decorating cookies
- Silly hat tea parties
- Watching meteor showers
- "Calling Bigfoot" parties
- Game parties with prizes
More expensive outings:
- Cross country train trips
- Visits to national parks
- Grand hotel visits
- Seeing scenic wonders by car
- Boat cruises
- Visiting foreign countries
- Opera and ballet performances
- Large museums of all types
Enriching the home life:
- Turn off all the lights for one night, light candles and a fire and tell stories.
- Sit around a bonfire and share: most embarrassing stories, silly things we did when we were small, things I like most about me, and more.
- Roast supper foods on an open fire.
- Have dinner outside on a picnic blanket.
- Have messy finger painting art projects on big plastic sheets.
- Be innovative with menus and dinner presentations.
- Put surprises in their lunch boxes and little packages on their pillows.
- Teach them skills like making jam from fruit they pick.
- Watch the sunset together and teach them about the stars.
- Have them choose foods for supper occasionally.
- Cuddle with them, praise them, and tell them you love them regularly.
- Jaylene loves riding around town at night, watching the lights. This is even better at Christmas as we sing our favorite songs.
Confidence through being taken seriously: Jaylene's artwork is on my blog, my online institute courses, and framed on my mantle where it is placed alongside expensive artwork. At times I "commission" art from her and use it in a book. I tell her she is very helpful in my work. She knows I am a single mother and that I work joyfully to provide for us. It means a lot to her that she can help.
She has modeled for the Shrihat Satva Yoga manual, earning money for her Christmas shopping. She has a little folder I made her called the Modeling Portfolio of Jaylene. She has earned blue ribbons at the fair for her canning (proudly displayed on a kitchen shelf), cooking, dried flower arrangements (we dry them ourselves), and art. I have framed these for her.
I honor her achievements and celebrate her life. At times I have had to buy her clothes at secondhand stores, but she has always been beautifully dressed with care. I take her seriously.
Solving school problems: We treat all Jaylene's teachers like family: with gratitude and respect. We recognize that theirs is often a thankless job and honor them with flowers and other gifts on Mother's Day, Valentine's Day, Christmas, and so on. They in turn treat Jaylene respectfully, providing a place for her to go if she is in distress. I am there to help them if they need me, and they are there for my daughter. It is a treasured relationship and teaches Jaylene gratitude.
We try to preempt problems. We have mapped out a course of action to take before something like bullying or menacing occurs. We have discussed what to do when menstruation occurs, when she needs to contact me in case she feels unwell, and so on. We even look at what could provoke the animosity of others. In this way, she is prepared and less likely to be taken by surprise.
Tutors: It is a bad habit to accept failure as the norm. If children have problems with a specific subject at school, either set aside time each week to tutor them yourself or have someone qualified tutor them for you. It is money well spent when failure is turned into success. At times teachers themselves are happy to spend an hour or so after school to help.
Having friends: Teach your children that when you are happy to be your own best friend (something they learn at home with solo play), it is not essential to have friends. From a parent's concerned attitude, a friendless child can feel like a failure. Prepare them for this possibility by:
- Discussing alternative activities if they are alone at recess (a good book, for instance).
- Having them practice with you on how to initiate conversation with a prospective new friend.
- Finding out whether there are peers they would like to have you invite over.
- Giving the message clearly that solitude is preferable to having the "wrong" friend.
Our world is our school and our fellow creatures are our teachers. All around us the environment speaks to us, wanting to share its mysteries in ecstatic revelations. The greatest gifts we can give our children are the intangibles of life: the robust self-confidence to ride its crests and valleys, the humble awareness of its magic.
It is good to encourage our babies to reach with exploring fingers for their teddy bears today and the world tomorrow. But the prevailing impressions come from our examples. We cannot instill happiness in our children if we are strangers to it ourselves.
The desire to give to them by example the knowledge that life is good and beautiful can be the catalyst for our shedding the cobwebs of careworn attitudes. In this way, our children also become our teachers, showing us once again the forgotten art of a life of grand adventure and graceful fluidity born of trust.